Earthworm Jim 3D

"Please insert Earthworm Jim 3D disc"

For less than a split second, I thought this may have been some kind of meta joke for this port. "Haha, get it? This is a digital copy! Remember physical media?" Nope, I had this pop up after selecting "new game" and having it immediately crash three times in a row.

All I ever wanted was to play Earthworm Jim 3D. I even memorized all of his catchphrases in advance, and I have the same disease as him, so I've always felt bonded to the character. Now I have to go tell my grandma that my life means nothing now, and its YOU'RE fault steam! I hope YOUR happy (emojis that convey anger and disappointed hatred and ambulance and ANGER)

The Jim In My Brain Says....Kill The Dog!



Jim: KIll Peter Puppy Smash Princess What's-Her-Name

Sound: 3
Graphics: 3
Story: 4
Gameplay: 4
Commands: 3
Fun: 2
Time to load / lag: 9
Bugs / Problems: 6
Final score: 2

Imagine Banjo-Kazooie, but throw out all of the charm of what made it great, make the collectathon part of the game worse, and reuse the same agonizing concept of a boss battle, and you have Earthworm Jim 3D. This is all the result of David Perry selling the rights of the EWJ franchise.

Where to begin? Since the dawn of time, Man has tried to discover meaning and purpose to life. Whether it be through religion, learning about a variety of subjects, production of art, thorough examinations of old live-action Nickelodean shows, or otherwise fruitless endeavors which lead to nothing, there are a variety of ways we can interpret meaning. For me, however, it would have to be thoroughly enjoying the content within this very game. While not the most intellectual, hardcore, or challenging game, Earthworm Jim 3D still comes out to be a true scholar's game of choice.
To begin with, the very controls are fluid, and allow you to perform many different actions with it's vast button arrangements, however it doesn't get to the point where the player is overwhelmed. It introduces "Dodge-Rolling", a concept Dark Souls would steal decades later, and to great effect. Getting out of the way in the nick of time from enemy rockets feels great, and allows for glorious comebacks on boss fights. Besides that, there is also his "Helicopter Hop", allowing him to compliment his already vast moveset with a handy hovering ability. Combine this with his High Jump, and you can go a considerable distance from being stationary.
Of course, I can't choose to forget mentioning his greatest asset: The weapons. From his basic gun, which isn't named in-game but I refer to as a Peashooter, to some of the more extreme weapons, such as the Elf(?) launcher, or even just using your own head as a whip, Jim's got a hefty arsenal to take down any foe. All the weapons (except his basic Whip attack, for a good reason; It doesn't use Ammo) feel amazing to use, hands down.
Finally, I can't not discuss the level design. The very first level you encounter instructs you without being overtly annoying, just explaining your options. You don't *need* to use all the options, such as the High Jump, in order to progress, but when doing so, you discover one of the many collectables scattered throughout the level. It's a great feeling picking them up, as you know that with each one picked up, you get closer and closer to that great reward at the end of the tunnel. Later levels see you using all the skills you've harnessed throughout and expertly timing them to succeed, and the gratifying feeling when you've gotten past an annoying section is without compare.
Overall, I mean this when I say it; Earthworm Jim 3D gets my dick harder than my wife does. Haha, just kidding, I don't have a wife. But I do have a girlfriend, and we have so much sex. I am not lying about this part. Earthworm Jim 3D has cured my ED, along with giving me confidence and a promotion at my job.

this game honestly isn't as bad as people make it out to be.
sure the boss battles are unfair and some of the gameplay mechanics are a little janky.
but overall it's a nice little experience.

(The only issue is the fact the game has no Music, however that issue can be fixed by installing a mod for the game)

This is a very bad port of the game you may be able to use a controller but you can only do 75% of all controls some of which you need. Overall I would say the game itself is just lukewarm but as soon as you get to the first boss just stop playing. Every boss is the same way terrible controls. Earthworm Jim 3D ironic because I give it a 3/10.

ACTUAL GARBAGE

Whilst this is a really enjoyable 3D platformer it is an absolute bitch to get running, I’m not even sure if you can get it running at all as there are no online patches. I’ve only been able to play this out of luck with a really old computer. On modern Systems however it crashes all the time and for some odd reason there’s a message saying “Jump if you want to play” that just pops up at random, there’s no way to make this message go away, forcing you to restart the game. How ever there are some gameplay mechanics that just haven’t aged well, perfect example being the atrocious camera. I can overlook this but for other people this can be a significant issue. Now as much as I love this game it pains me to say it’s really not worth it unless you have an old pc and have heaps of nostalgia for it.
With the abundance of remakes and remasters of older games at the moment, this game really does deserves one.

Two important details: I have 100%'d this game Earthworm Kim on the N64, and you need to pretty much just pirate the game(it’s trusted and from a steam post) to add the music to it; the steam version does not have music, and this is the only fix I know of.

Okay, so you have come across this game not knowing that EWJ had a 3D game- congratulations! This no doubt led you to the question floating around in your head, "does this game suck?". I am very glad you thought of that; I am going to provide you with a decisive answer to that. Yes. This game does in fact suck a lot, but also no. Earthworm Jim 3D contains a lot of flaws, such as: wonky camera, poorly constructed levels, and terrible platforming- sounds not fun, though there is a bright side to this; the game is fun~. The camera tests your patience, the levels are ridiculous, and the platforming pain grows on you like a tumour. So, in summary you are going to finish this game feeling like a disciplined monk, while also enjoying some of the most off the rails level design that you never expected to be conjured in a human brain. Speaking of brain, the game takes place in Earthworm Jim's brain, and the objective is to go around collecting stuff so you can face off against your inner self to escape the coma you are in.

The game play is you going around collecting udders(cause of how udderly stupid the game is) and marbles(you lost your marbles lol), like is banjo kazooie style, except the over world is as small as you would expect a worm's brain to be. You shoot chickens at hedgehogs, launch fridges into space, battle Italian aliens, avoid suicidal rabbits, express your dislike for disco, and possibly also indulge in your desires for cowboys and old ladies. You jump around, shoot stuff, and give 'em the classic worm whip like in the 2D games.

Anyways, spoiler alert here.. though, not that it matters cause the game doesn't really contain a plot beyond absurdity: the entire game is about repressing your feelings of gender dysphoria, and refusing to transition by battling against your inner being enough to ignore your how you have always felt, and trap those emotions within your mind so you can move on in life without being who you want to be.

So, 8.2/10 tbh; I highly recommend you play this game. Not because it is good or anything, but because it's an experience in itself.

Cmon people, this game is not THAT bad... After all, it did not infect my PC with a virus that makes videocard combust. Stop giving it negative reviews.

Hahaha.

Nope. Couldn't be bothered to even beat the first brain area. Just did the first level, got utterly bored and left on the second level and ran away in horror at boss level once I realized what I will have to do with those controls.

Bah, I have no mood to put effort into this.

PC version is actually better than N64 one once fan patched (once again, look for it in EWJ1 Steam community guides section). Because it has more audio tracks and they are CD quality. Otherwise, hmmm... To be honest, with fan-patch it seemed to recognise my Xbox One gamepad fine but then Jim slowed down anytime I moved diagonally. And when I got sick of it and diconnected it in order to make use of keyboard, the game softlocked with a message that read something like "Anyone here wants to jump back right in?". Weird. So uh, don't disconnect it. Doesn't mean that it requires gamepad connected, just don't disconnect it during gameplay if you had it connected.


Anyway, this game. Completely misses the fun of Earthworm Jim, yes. It's cartoonish... in the most bland way possible, with very little originality. Really weak.

It's collect-a-thon, but you move at slow pace and there is no fun movement and stages themselves are often really, really boring.

There is shooting/combat, as unexciting as it is... but good luck with that camera.

Oh boy. Camera. Usually when people complain about camera in 3D platformers I actually find them pretty fine. Not here. This one is actually awful and won't show what matters without slamming the camera turning buttons repeatly. Wow.

Uh, there are dialogs but they are really lame and bland.

Boss fights are copy-pasted contest of buttsliding over sandpaper.
Actually, it's pork-riding but IT'S BAD.

Uhghhhhhhghgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
It's one of those games that make me think that I am wasting my time on junk and that's an ugly sign. Yes yes.
worst

Not even same music composer.

I'm not normally the type to get angry at games, but the bullcrap that I had to endure really got on my nerves. it's so bad that the music doesn't even work! I can't recomend this at all, and that makes me sad. Earthworm Jim 1 and 2 are both amazing platformers, and it makes me sad to see that the legacy of this franchise is tarnished by this dumpster fire.

Game does not work no matter what. It sucks hard, cause I bought it as collection, so can't refund it as a seperate game. Other 2 games worked fine.

This game was eh back in the day and horrible now.

Graphics are not the issue as they are your traditional N64/PS1 feel.

Soundtrack does not even play.

Controls do not translate well to PC.

Price is a joke like this title.

This game is not as bad as everyone says. Sure, it has problems, but it isn't a bad game. Nevertheless, I wish that this wasn't the last game in the series. The game is challenging, and unfair at times, but it can be fun still. The music in this version doesn't work, but you can download a patch off the Internet pretty easily. F**k the porkboarding sections, though. Those are absolutely unplayable.

First things first. This game is pretty good. It's pretty easy, but it's alright, and fans of the series will enjoy it.

That's not why I'm writing this review, though. I'm writing it because... there are some very interesting quirks to the PC version.
The less interesting error you'll encounter is, if you try to render it above 1080p, it won't work. That's not really such a big deal - I didn't expect it to work above 720, so whatever.
The more interesting bug is that the port does NOT include the music. See, the original release of the game read the music tracks from the disc and installed most of the rest to your drive. This one has a bypass so you can play it "without the disc."
But this means you will have NO music. At all.
Unless... well, you see, when I first played the game, I didn't realize I'd left a CD in my drive. So... instead of hearing the standard entry level music, I heard Smash Mouth's, "Holiday In My Head." I cracked up, because not only was it not meant to be playing, but... "Holiday In My Head." That is... the game.
This continued on every level for a while. Running past the grenades got me "Shoes 'n' Hats." After the second world, though, the music stopped entirely. The Smash Mouth CD only had so many tracks, after all. I bet if I'd put in my Sonic Adventure CD, it would have filled in all the blanks.

This port DOES have all the sound effects and textures, so it's not technically broken. And it plays really nice with a modern controller. But... look, I know some cats are against emulating. So just buy this. Now you own it, hooray! And go emulate the N64 version. It's okay, trust me.
If, however, you want the music to have nothing to do with the source game, OR if you already own the original disc, you might as well play this version. It really is a wonderful experience.

I do not like to review games since every person has there own opinion, and just because someone says a game is bad or good does not mean it is for you, the reason i am writing this is beacuse this game seems to not work at all. it only worked once and after doing all the steps listed by steam support it still does not work, so be warned those who want to buy this game.

The classic franchise got what every franchise got in the 90's, a 3D game! While it isn't as great as Mario 64, it certainly made a better 3D game than OTHER franchises. (cough) Bubsy (cough) Some people don't like this game, I really don't see the reasons behind the hate except that it has a terrible camera. But change some of the controls and download a Google Drive file that someone posted in the Steam community for this game and install it by following thier instructions, and you have a winner that finished an epic trilogy on a good, solid note! Sing with me one more time, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRli1rRMoSQ

I do not understand how this game can be made for kids!! The games audio is close to broken (it actually started playing music from Frogger 2 during the game because it was in my disk drive.) The pace is really slow and tedious. I'm not even past the first level and now im stuck at the FIRST BOSS because the game controls are also broken and weird. Not to mention, apart from it crashing, Sometimes the game promts me to "reinsert the CD-Rom" which is unbelievable. I get it's an older game but that s**t is too much. Only thing I liked was that it was only $3 so I dont completely hate myself for actually spending money on this garbage.

DEVELOPERS: Game Randomly freezes and says Please Insert CD-ROM which requires force-close with task manager and does not save the game. It seems most vulernable to this in the hub world or paused. Also, the game will not save video / control settings.

If you don't have a Nintendo system, you have a limited selection of animated 3D platformers. This game scratches the itch quite nicely with it's qwerky sense of humor and Free-Range Exploration. And although it's easier than it's 16 bit counterparts and utilizes auto and manual saving, like most games from the 90s, it will challenge you with unforgiving collecting requirements and limited lives. It ran smoothly on my Windows XP 1.8ghz system. Bring your own music because it's been removed, evidentally, for copyright reasons. Also, although I could save the game, it didn't seem to save my control and video settings. I managed some permanent custom controls including turbo whip and camera by keyboard mapping to my controller using xpadder. A very underrated title. Put down your realistic war or bloody zombie game for a while and walk or crawl into this free-roaming, challenging, and light hearted genre.

This port is absolutely horrible. Glitches Galore, missing sound, Music, Constantly Crashes, Bad Controls. This is a good game, but this version is nothing short of broken and unplayeable. You're better off buying an N64 and Physical copy of the game.

Everyone who purchased this deserves a refund!!

Don't.
Even.
Bother.
This game was bad on the N64.
It's worse now, and the music doesn't even work.
The controls are so bad that the first boss is nearly unbeatable.
Go get Psychonauts instead.

This is a great game, one of my best childhood game-related memories. It's challenging, but rewarding. Good creative setting and characters, awesome music and entertaining gameplay(though the controls are tricky at times). The steam version is missing all music files, so be sure to look the fix for this up before you start playing. It can be found in the community page for the game. A 64-bit era classic.

The king of werid imaginations and creativeness in a game. Whoever thought up this game didn't have a entirely sane mind. It is because of its strange content a one of kind amazing game and very fun to play.