Farnham Fables

King: So, my three wonderful children rode off on their horses to the nearest bus station, because it was faster and more efficient to take the bus than simply ride their steeds the whole way there, ha ha ha ha!
Me: Why not go by the taxi then? Subway? Personal limousine? Oh, right, what limo, those princes ride buses... "Ticket please, Mr. Prince!"

i got this as part of a random games bundle so note i never would have purchased this for myself.

this game is what you get when you ask your creepy uncle who is a furry pedophile to make a point and click adventure game

Oh, this is an odd one. It somehow borders on furry porn (or I guess I should say "scalie" porn?) without a single drop of outright porn. Each episode is a micro-adventure set in the fantasy land of The Kingdom of Farnham. Is it high fantasy? There are kings and horses and healing mushrooms -- and of course, all those smooth-crotched animal people who like being tied up, tickled, and gently spanked. Or is it low fantasy? There are tractors and cars and bus stops and high schools with turbine roof vents (I learned what those things were called from this game). Who knows? What I do know is that it's weirdly fun watching Andrew Tallini dance "innocently" around his peccadilloes while telling stories that are almost wholesome. No, scratch that -- in the main, the stories actually are wholesome. That's what's so dang weird! So, give it a try just to say you've had a real indie experience, and tell me if you've played a point 'n' click with so many custom responses for useless or mildly skeevy things.

UPDATE:

Three is the most elaborate episode yet, and also the least pervy, though there are lizard nipples (?!) and numerous references to the ever handsy Prince Frederick. There must be literally hundreds of funny item/usage combinations. It also gave me sleepy, nostalgic feelings of being a kid in public school again, sans the anxiety I now see as pointless in adult hindsight. Very comfy indeed!

(I normally would never go for something like this, but I was so impressed by the naked earnestness of Andrew's creativity that I went and bought episode 4 from itch.io.)

I was hoping to see something really disturbing by looking into the "abyss" but what I got instead was a super short and easy point and click with badly drawn naked lizard people. This game isn't even remotely worth the dollar I spent on it. I would get a refund, but it is no ones fault but my own for buying this... thing.

Farnham Fables is a series of classic styled first-person point and click adventure games, generally very short and easy because the experience is meant to be more friendly than anything else, and you aren't listening to a word of this because you're staring at that topless lizard lady in the banner, aren't you.

Let's get the obvious elephant in the room out of the way, then: Yes, there is lots of nudity, including preteen characters. This is most apparent in episode 1, where a large portion is set in... it's not a nudist colony but it may as well be for the characters you tend to meet. Crotchless Ken doll anatomy keeps anything too scandalous from happening below the belt, but there are definitely nipples.

This was at the forefront of episode one, but it calms down somewhat in later episodes. The developer told me that there was a very deliberate decision to put the worst of it right upfront so as to avoid surprising anyone with it later; if you can handle episode one, you can handle anything. Which isn't to say that sort of content isn't there in episodes two and three as well. It's just more behind closed doors, to the point that if you go out of your way enough to see the nudie Easter eggs, that's pretty much your fault at that point.

There, that's addressed. Now if I can turn your attention away from the lizard boobies (I know this may be difficult) there's an actual game here and that's kind of worth talking about too.

Farnham games are, as I said, short and easy. My first run through each episode, which involved me figuring out the puzzle solutions for the first time, took all of about 40 minutes per episode after counting some exploration and randomly looking at things. The sense of conflict is generally low, as well. For example, episode 2 was about a girl on a farm who accidentally let one of their cows break the fence and escape, so the primary objectives as her siblings are to find the cow, fix the fence, and cheer her up because she feels bad about the whole thing. There's zero danger, so I only ever felt the need to save once in episode 3, and even that was just because Steam wasn't letting me take a screenshot so I wanted to see if closing and reopening it would help.

By a deliberate design decision, the actual solving of the puzzles and beating the game is separated from the poking-around-at-stuff exploration, and is generally streamlined. You could probably do a TAS of episode 1 in about 40-50 seconds once you already knew what to click on and skipped through the text.

It's pure fluff, is what I'm saying. If you're a die-hard Sierra/Infocom veteran who thinks it's not a real adventure game unless it murders you and makes the game unwinnable at least eight times per screen, this isn't for you. This is a simple, happy, stress-free little experience where characters are generally nice to each other and they hug their comparatively easy problems out because games are supposed to be fun.

The true meat of any Farnham game is the dizzying amount of optional interactions. There is a unique response for everything you can think to try. Sure, you kind of expect to be able to look at/examine (which are two different verbs in this game)/talk to/rub your entire inventory against everyone in adventure games, and maybe the fancy ones won't punt too many things to a generic "I can't use these things together" response. Farnham takes it to the next level where everything has a unique response. Also, the GIVE command works on things you don't actually own, which allows you to rub any two elements on the screen against each other. You can give a rock to a flower even if you can't collect either, and of course doing so produces a different response than if you give the flower to the rock.

For people, "Give X to Y" is usually interpreted to mean "Display X's perspective on what they think about Y" and of course that's going to be different from Y's thoughts on X. If I'm doing the math right, a room with n named elements in it contains (n * (n - 1)) such combinations, meaning a room with 10 people in it has 90 unique responses to command combinations the player can enter for Give alone. Add in the other verbs, the inventory....

Also, Farnham Fables games have screens that have 15-20 characters in them.

Like, several of them.

The crowd scenes are all minor NPCs. None of them play an important role in the episodes in which they appear; they are walk-on cameos at best. None of them would need so much as a name in any other game. Here, the author has this world built and planned to such an alarming extent that not only is every single one of them named, but if you want to know what the girl in the blue shorts in episode 3 (Linda) thinks of the girl in the blue skirt next to her (Yolanda) then the game has everyone's thoughts on everyone else all figured out and ready to go.

All in all, I spent longer writing this review than I did actually playing and beating all three episodes combined. You probably spent longer reading it than it would have taken you to play and beat it at least one of them. However, that's okay, because I know for a fact I've only seen a tiny fraction of what each episode has to offer. The rest is there whenever I go back to it. That's why these games are designed so "beat the game" and "poke around at stuff" are two entirely different, unrelated goals.

This series is kind of weird and definitely hard to explain to your friends, but it's surprisingly nice.

A cute little adventure point and click game.

The First Episode deals with the story of King Farnham, and his sons.

The Second Episode deals with two farmers living in the kingdom of Farnham.

This game is not that challenging but also not easy, and is a fun little adventure game.

It is also slightly erotic, which was the main reason this game caught my eye and why I bought it during the Summer Sale of 2016.

Meh it's okay. A cute little adventure story that will take you maybe five minutes at most per episode. A smattering of "choose-your-own-adventure" style choices but nothing that really impacts the overall plot. Music is pretty enjoyable (which was surprising) but the dialogue is hit-or-miss (not so surprising). However the pricing is spot-on and I don't feel like I wasted what little money I spent. Just note: those expecting for some sneaky lizard hentai after looking at the title image will be disappointed. You get a few pixalated lizard boobies and that's about it. In short, a pretty enjoyable few minutes that has a clear goal and knows exactly what it wants to do - tell an admittedly charming, if short, story and hope that you'll come along for the journey. And I for one love it for that.

Played with friends. The reviews were right. I oddly want to play more.
I rate this 9 naked lizard girls out of ten

"It was not till the days of Jacob that the promised seed attained to such maturity as to render a certain amount of intercourse with heathenism both desirable and useful." Professor Johann Heinrich Kurtz wrote this passage in his work, History of the Old Covenant, Volume II in the year of 1859. J.H. Kurtz, D.D., Professor of Theology at Dorprat, was the very foundation of the composition Farnham Fables, developed by Ethrea Dreams. The beauty and amusement of the piece of art lies within the climactic, theatrical story composed by the developers and authors, who allow the spirit of Professor Kurtz to live on through their crown jewel. To avoid any confusion, the following quote is from the masterpiece Farnham Fables, and is not from the works of Professor Johann Heinrich Kurtz. " 'Ahnee Nayjee Ahnee look look issa cass- iss iss DA CASSLE!!!' Cally excitedly exclaims." Despite being entangled in the absolutely absorbing narrative and folklore of the game, you will have a hard time neglecting the modern perfection that is the sprite and backdrop craftsmanship, where great time and care has clearly been taken to ensure the fulfillment of the game's aesthetic. This biblical point-and-click adventure is a must-play for any lovers of the fine arts and those with only the most refined taste in video gaming; in particular those who relish the idea of tickling reptilian toddlers whilst their repitlian mothers cheer them on. "Fredrick picks up Gloria and starts tickling her armpits like crazy, causing her to squeal with hysterical laughter. Rachael actually encourages him to tickle her more when he eventually stops, but Fredrick thinks she's had enough, for now." -Farnham Fables, 2016.

Farnham Fables is a jarring interactive narrative, it is pure shlock in video game form. FF isn't the kind of game you shouldn't touch if you can't allow to enjoy the absurd. The amount of weird actions you can do, that you're at one moment you're in a medieval castle and then at a modern bus station, that you can try to hug just about everyone and every thing all this is apart of it's absurd appeal. Someone put their heart into this and it comes off as completely ludicious. And y'know what, I don't want the creator(s) to change at all. I want that same energy and heart to go into more games like this.

I'm not even kidding when I say that the only game I'm looking forward to is FF episode 3. I've stared into the abyss and the abyss has stared back at me. Time is a flat circle. God is dead. Please release the third episode ASAP.

I love point and click adventure games but what the heck did I just play? I admit I read some of the reviews and thought people were just making up everything that was said but nope now I understand.

- Very short game over in like 10 minutes if that
- Naked lizard people
- Human kissing and tickling naked lizard woman and her child, yes AND her child!
- Strange naked lizard doctor who is clearly stuck in the 70's.

I wouldn't bother playing this game unless you got it for free and is into disturbing behavior.

I enjoyed this game, while it could have done with being a bit longer it is still fun and while the whole deal with one of the Princes being very... well 'open', that could have been delved more to make it not seem like he was a bit of a pedo.

Overall, I enjoyed it and can't wait for the second episode to come out.

The reviews for this game are odd and silly; this game is cute. For 99 cents (and less during sales!) its definitely worth it.

Its a short and simple point and click adventure game about a 3 princes and their quest to cure their father. The game can be beaten within half an hour. Its not much, but the writing is surprisingly believable and the characters fleshed out well enough to have very obviously discernable personalities, each with their own likes and dislikes. In that sense, the short time you spend with them is endearing. I hope that a sequel or another chapter or something is made for this. It really was an adorable little tale.

Also, there's lizard boobs, but its oddly innocent and is like looking at a National Geographic book. Still, I guess that's nice for those who might be fond of that sort of thing.

Farnham Fables is quite honestly one of the goofiest trips I'm glad I decided to take. Do not get me wrong, this game is uncomfortable, bizzarly sexual at inapropiate times, and (despite its overuse nowadays) the definiton of cringe. But it is so offbeat, and (what appears to be) unintentionally creepy, that I can't help but reccomend this game, for those of you who play things with "Irony".
*Without spoiling* what makes this purchase worth it, Farnham Fables starts off with a kid and her aunt going to explore a Castle. But as the kid gets uneasy, she runs off, and randomly bumps into to the king. The King then tells a story about three princes who saved his life. Three Princes whose hormones also run through them like 12 year olds on Middle School Prom Night. I refuse to spoil the rest.
I think what made me the most happy was the fact that there is clearly a lot of effort put into this, despite how "Crude" it looks (although crude is probably a understatement). Every action with an object in the environment has its own line of dialogue. Everything. I spent a couple of minutes swapping between the princes to search the trash, because each character had something werid to say. I honestly questioned at times "was it too much?". The answer is probably, but it made it enjoyable.

LIGHT SPOILERS (Skip to Conlude if you honestly care)


The Cringe Factor, The Creep Factor, the WTF Factor, all derive from the dialogue. There is some imagery too, but nothing too NSFW. Just some boobs at some point. The dialogue, though, has tons of werid sexual comments, from flat out saying the kid at the begining likes naked male models, to explaining that the Prince is only slightly happier about finding a potion *TO SAVE HIS FATHERS LIFE* in comparison seeing a rack on a lizzard. Another good moment is if you try to wear a skirt you find, in a forest, that also belongs to a kid. Literally, you can't do it, but they provide the option just to reveal dialogue that says the sexually scared prince Phillip use to cross dress when he was younger. Is it too much? For some, oh yeah, but thats what makes it. Trust me cringe lovers, this is gold.



CONCLUDE
If you want to pay $1 to experience a 3MB file that was crafted suprisingly well, with some passionatly drawn MS Paint, thats also short, with crude Point and Click adventure controlls, you could do much worse. I would argue this is "The Room" level of enjoyment, folks. A genuine 10/10.

The kingdom has a gat-dam bus stop but not one resident considered actually bringing this automotive technology into their homeland.

The lizard doctor talks like Tommy Chong.

Had to juggle a loincloth between the three brothers just so a fox can sniff it.

Defeating the only enemy is literally as simple as "use sword on boar".

Frederick is way too happy to be around the naked lizard girl.

I only played the game until the end because I wanted to laugh at a terrible steam game, and even that's no excuse. There's nothing to laugh at; there is only disgrace. The only pro is that there is an "info" button that lets you know exactly who should be ashamed of themselves.

Because there is some trigger ravaged reviews here, we must get this out of the way: No, there is no sexual content in this game. There is some nudity in the sense that a National Geographic photo of a tribe have some nudity. Some people here have serious issues.

This is a point and click adventure game who thankfully stay away from pixel hunting. It is very short, you will finish before even getting the trading cards. (My play time is almost entirely idling)

The graphics are okay, looking like an eighties adventure game, and do the job right. And the story is quite nice.

There is little more to say because it is too short, even for 1€. But if you can purchase it with your steam wallet, it's a nice break between two FPS.

This game has some strange fetishes included in it, and I'm not going to lie when I say they're disturbing as hell.

A naked lizard man, naked lizard children and a topless lizard mother are all in this game. And yes, all three are sexualized in some fashion. From one of the characters being happy the lizard child doesn't want to get dressed, kissing the child on the lips, and doing it all in front of the mother - this game's pedophilic undertones are a bit more than just "obvious".

I've always loved the old school point-and-click adventures but this is something different entirely, and it's pretty goddamn profane. Personally, I think the devs should be ashamed. Not just becaused they released a game that takes about 10 minutes to beat, but that they have the audacity to release something like this on Steam.

I got some mix feelings about this so bare with me.

The music overall is... decent, but tries too hard to be DOS-music, I guess? I don't know. Some of it just didn't sit well with me while some I was okay with. I do wish more work was put in for the music. I can't find anymore words to comment on this.

The story is simple and short (less than 30 minutes), however the setting I'm confused; medieval, tribes, and modern socity as one? Sounds like an interesting idea on paper, but execution needs to be planned very well, and this sorta went half-way on it. Good attempt though, I'll give it that much.

The story alone feels like it's aimed more toward younger readers, however visually toward a mature audience, so unsure what target audience they were going for with this game. That's where most of my mix feelings come from, while partially from the music.

The artstyle (I refuse to call it graphics for this game) is pretty simple as it can get for an old-school-esque adventure game. Took me a bit to understand the UI. However, I didn't like that I had to use a UI window to go in a direction than just simply click on it. That was the only issue I had with it that I found odd and inconvenient for me.

I felt a bit stuck near the end, however noticed something peculiar with a bush that had a black hole in it the 2nd time I went by it.

Sure there is nudity (which is not even a real focus I may add) but it's the more artsy kind of nudity (aka non-sexual aka non-fanservice, etc.), like drawing a live model in art class in college or the ancient greek sculptures. It usually fits well with tribal worlds than anything else so it sat very well with me.

If people get that easily offended just by the sight of breasts or anyone nude in a non-sexual way, that's purely on them and their own problem for getting worked up about it. I fail to see how that can be the dev's fault.

I did take a few minutes to try silly combinations and see what would happen (and this will really add up the game hours to find them all). Gotten a few chuckles but didn't explore every combination yet (good excuse to do while waiting for the card drops). Wanted to get the story done first to get this review up properly.

This game isn't perfect, but isn't bad either. It's average more towards good. Worth the $0.99 though as I didn't see anything that I found disturbing as some people were exaggerating about, with zero technical issues to boot, and overall found it alright for the price. I did notice some grammar issues I would like to point out to the dev if I can, though, in private.

So, yeah, not gonna ask for a refund just because I finished the story under 2hrs as that'll be abusing the refund policy since I did enjoy it and gave it a chance from start to finish.

P.S.: I was, at some point, expecting the CG that's displayed on the steam store to show up. That would've been great. A mother reunited with her child that got lost in the forest after wondering off to it. ^_^ Guess it's not possible with this game. Shame, really.

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Thought I'd get a charming king's quest-like adventure with lizard-people. Instead I looked into the abyss.

Simple story, with no coherence whatsoever. (Tribal lizardpeople, medieval royality? A bus?)
Awful graphics with little polish.
About 10 minutes of actual gameplay, the rest is pointless click searching for one item.
The lizard tits aren't even good.

This game makes meeting eldritch gods a decent past time.

The game is a fairly short point and click story based around european folk tales. A child is sick and the king hires a hero to go and find a cure. It's quick, it's straight forward, and it's a decent 20 min experience.
Things you might consider before purchasing however are -
It does contain nudity, not sexualized but just normal nudity. (A question could be asked WHY it's there as it doesn't add or subtract from the experience in any way).
I found one area to be particularly jarring and completely out of place in a world of small thatch villages and king's castles, why does the sword wielding hero get to the exploration site on a bus?
I think the best way to summarize my view would be that is seems like a person telling a story rather than a story that flows from a mechanics stand point and the things that made it from a bedtime story to a playable game subtract from the experience as a whole. Should you buy? ... i liked it's premise so for a dollar yes i would say so.